No Need for an intro, let's get right into it.
1) The Mile High Club
Arguably more important than sneaking off with a newfound acquaintance into the rear lavatory, the mile high shotgun is a right of passage and a white belt challenge for any wannabe shotgun hero. Book a plane ticket to grandmas, snag a Bud Light at 20,000 feet, send it to its home, and then hang out with ya nan until her bedtime and go hit the town. Easy enough.
2) The Final Exam
Lucky for you this final exam has no backside, but when you shotgun a beer in the middle of class you better watch your backside because you’re gonna be a hot commodity with the ladies…or dudes…in that class for the rest of the semester. Legend status.
3) The 23 Pack
Sooooo you’re headed to the local Walmart (or Target for you boujie folks) to pick up a 24-pack for you and the boys…and Carly because she’s Chad’s girlfriend and she’’s actually kinda chill. Well, while you’re there you might as well knock this one off the list, open up the 24, pull one of those aluminum cans of gold out of the box and ShurtGurn it into oblivion. Then when you head up to check out plop that 23-rack on the self check out, ring it up, and get the heck on outta there.
4) The Promotion
There’s literally no bigger power move than whipping out a…cold one at your place of work and slugging it in record time. Sally from accounting (or Doug from Marketing for the ladies) will be impressed by your shotgunning skills and there’s a 75% chance you’ll be immediately promoted. Disclaimer: These stats are not backed with real data, but we’re probably right.
5) The Appetizer
It’s no secret that drinks at restaurants are overpriced as shit and it’s also no secret that the person you’re on a date with would be impressed with your 3-second….shotgun. Whip out those keys, grab ahold of your beer shark, and rip a shotty before the wait staff sees ya. Then celebrate by ordering some guac…after all you did just save some guap. Ba dum tsss.
*Disclaimer* BeerShark does not condone, nor promote illegal activity. If you decide to attempt any of the following, please do so legally or not at all.